| Why the Makers of Clorox Will Never Go Out of Business |  |
by Bryon D. Howell |
As far as our love was concerned, I had but no choice getting to the heart of your matters. I relentlessly sliced through your pillow just to get to the feathers. I flipped the mattress to see if I could feel a difference. I placed your slippers on the back porch and faced them North. I did all this yet I couldn't be ruthless enough. I could never be so malicious as to literally pluck the feathers from some defenseless bird. I'm sorry I ever turned the mattress over because of the scars we left there. And to top off the tyranny of my would-be sinister means, all I ever really had to do was accept the truth and shut that bitch of a sliding door to keep the rest of the cold out and finalize the exchange. Not one of my chilly endeavors helped me do anything resembling helping us reach a reconciliation. And now, I'm having trouble simply putting it all to bed - finally, for good. As far as feathers are concerned, you went straight for the wings. All I can do now is sit tight, avoid paying too much for true love ever again in the near future and wait, for the white sale.
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